The customer is NOT always right!

It’s Gonna Be A Looooong Year

, , , , , , | Right | CREDIT: TestUserHanzyBaby | January 1, 2021

It’s New Year’s and we’re kicking out customers after a manic event — it’s 6:30 am by this point — where the club reached capacity, approximately 4000 people. We’re all exhausted and quite frankly looking forward to our staff party after work for working New Year and New Year’s Day, so we’re trying to get everyone out quickly so I’ve been asked to help in the cloakroom.

Customer: “I’ve lost my ticket. Can you look for my coat for me?”

The majority of the customers still need to leave; she’s one of the first I serve.

Me: “Sorry, but I’m afraid it’s club policy that if you’ve lost your ticket you have to wait till the end for us to find your coat.”

Customer: “It’s not f****** difficult. I’ll tell you what it looks like and you can get it.”

Me: “I’m really sorry, but as I said before, I can’t get your coat until the end unless you have a ticket.”

Customer: “Listen here, you f****** b****. Just look for my f****** coat. It’s black.”

Me: “There are about 2000 black coats back there. I’m not looking for yours until the end or until you have the ticket.”

Customer: “Why the f*** not?”

Me: “Firstly, I’m not allowed to. Secondly, that’s the biggest waste of time.”

Customer: “F*** you, you little c***. You’re going to find me my f****** coat.”

She continues to shout and call me names for about five minutes before I can say anything.

Me: “I’m not finding your coat. Now go to the back of the line and wait.”

Customer: “I have f****** work at nine o’clock; I don’t have time to be waiting around.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but you should have thought of that before you decided to go clubbing until six in the morning.”

Customer: “Stupid b****, get me your f****** manager.”

Me: “I can tell you now that she will tell you exactly the same.”

The manager had observed this whole incident and went to speak to her. The customer continued to swear and called me and the manager a bunch of obscene names. This went on for about ten minutes until the manager told her, quite forcefully, that if she was not going to wait, she could go home and call back when she was sober. The customer sulked off to the back of the queue, calling me a b****, etc., under her breath. It took so much for me not to lose my temper with her.

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Just Say It; Don’t Spray It

, , , , | Right | CREDIT: TESTUSER1234 | November 3, 2020

I’m at work at a lumberyard and hardware store.

Customer: “I need some spray cans.”

Me: “Okay, spray cans as in spray paint?”

Customer: “No! Not spray paint! Spray cans!

Me: “I’m sorry, can you be more specific? What kind of spray are you looking for?”

Customer:Come on! Spray cans! They are cans that have lots of different colors.”

Me: “Okay, so spray paint.”

Customer: *Angrily* “NO! Spray cans!”

Me: “Okay, I’ll just show you what I think you want.”

I bring him over to the spray paint aisle.

Customer: “Yeah, this is what I want!”

He grabbed several cans of spray paint.

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Got You Working Down To The Wire

, , , | Right | November 3, 2020

I work at a well-known home and hardware store with extended trading hours. Obviously, we don’t have the full team on at seven am as we do at, say, ten am. I am working at the checkout.

Me: “Hi, how are you?”

The customer ignores me and slams down a piece of electrical wire he had cut.

Customer: “Just this.”

Me: “Now, did anyone cut this for you, so I can look it up in the system?”

Customer: “No, I just cut it myself.”

Me: “That’s fine. Next time, just try to get someone to cut it for you as it can be a little difficult to find on our system up the front and I don’t want you to wait longer than you need to.”

Customer: “NO! I waited around for fifteen minutes and no one helped me. You should have people running up and down the aisles to serve me. There was no one there!”

Me: “Sorry about that. We have a big blue desk in the middle of the back section of the store. There’s generally always someone there to help.”

Customer: “Why should I have to do that? That’s what you guys are paid for!”

It must have been unknown knowledge to him, but my colleagues actually have stuff to do in the morning when it is quiet; they can’t just meander around waiting for a customer! Furthermore, we had only been open for about fifteen minutes and it would have taken him at least five minutes to put through the rest of his order.

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Someone Took Jane Elliott Seriously

, , , | Right | November 3, 2020

I work in a supermarket in the reductions team. I am reducing fresh fruit and vegetables. Although I know a fair bit about the products, I have no say in the prices as they’re set at a regional level.

Customer: “Excuse me. Why are the loose carrots six pence more expensive than the packaged carrots?”

Me: “I’m not too sure, really. I could have a guess as to why, but I couldn’t say for sure.”

Customer: “I mean, they really should be cheaper as they don’t need to pay for the plastic packaging, which isn’t good for the environment. I can’t stand having to pay for plastic. David Attenborough showed us it is bad!”

She continues in this vein for a couple more minutes.

Me: “I agree it shouldn’t be more. However, it probably is more as the cheaper carrots are within the value range, whereas these carrots aren’t. But I can’t say for sure. Your best bet would be to email the head office to complain.”

Customer: *Looks in my eyes* “Ah, you’re hazel-eyed, not green. No wonder you don’t know.”

She picked up the pre-packed carrots, despite ranting about the plastic, and walked off. Later, I saw her giving the same rant to the checkouts manager, who had less idea than I did about the reason why. I still don’t get what my eye colour has to do with any of it!

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We Eat People Like You For Breakfast, Part 2

, , , , | Right | November 3, 2020

I am sixteen and have just started working as a server at a breakfast-themed restaurant. I’m still learning the menu. A man in his mid-twenties seats himself in my section while I’m cleaning a table, so I go to the back and wash my hands and go out to his table.

Me: “Hi, my name is [My Name] and I’ll be your server today! I’m sorry about the wait. We usually seat people ourselves. What can I start you off with?”

Customer: “I need a glass of water because you keep it hot inside.”

Me: “All right, and can I get your food order, as well?”

Customer: “How the f*** can I do that when I didn’t get a menu?!”

Me: “Sir, we usually give them when we seat someone, but you seated yourself. I can bring one out with your water.”

Customer: “I guess that works.”

I go to the back and ask another server to take that table, as I’m sure he will give me problems, but they refuse.

Me: “Here is a cold water and the menu. I’ll be back in a moment to get the order.”

Customer: “Can’t you take it now? I’ve been here for ten minutes.”

Me: “Yes, sir. What can I get you?”

Customer: “Umm, does the turkey dinner come with garlic bread?”

Me: “No, sir, we do not serve garlic bread, but we do offer oth—”

Customer: “Yes, you f****** do! The [Same Restaurant Chain] in [Town a few states away] serves it every time!”

Me: “Sir, we do not serve that here. We may have before, but on these new menus, we do not.”

Customer: “I bet it’s because you have those illegals working in the back.”

Me: “Can I finish taking your order?”

Customer: “Yeah, get me pancakes and steak.”

Me: “All right, anything else?”

Customer: “The garlic bread.”

Me: “We do not have that here.”

Customer: “Stop lying to me, you dumb b****.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we don’t serve that.”

Customer: “Fine, get me just that, and make it right.”

Me: “I just put in the orders, but I’ll make sure the cook knows.”

When I bring out his food, he is on the phone, so I just set it on the table and walk away. I’m watching to see if he needs anything, and I see him take the lids off of all four syrups on the table and dump them all over his plate, table, and seats. He then tells the person on the phone that I’m lazy and a bad server.

Me: “Sir, can I get you anything, like a wet rag?”

Customer: “It’s not my job to clean it. Turn down the heat. And you didn’t bring me the right drink. I never got my d*** bread. Why did they even hire a stupid high school girl to work?”

I am fed up at this point.

Me: “Sir, you asked for water and I brought it for you. I am not allowed to touch the heater; only the managers can. I was hired because I’m a hard worker. I’m apparently smarter than you, because you can’t even understand that we do not have garlic bread at a breakfast-themed restaurant. Here is your ticket. Please pay and leave as soon as possible.”

He was embarrassed, and I no longer have a job, but it was so worth it.

We Eat People Like You For Breakfast

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